Tuesday, August 26, 2008,11:15 PM
hi guys(and girls)
this is an excerpt from Donald Miller's Blue Like Jazz, many thanks to Clara for lending me the book.
I hope this will bless you.
I think the difference in my life came when i realized, after reading those Gospels, that Jesus didn't just love me out of principle; He didn't just love me because it was the right thing to do. Rather, there was something inside me that caused Him to love me. I think I realized that if I walked up to His campfire, He would ask me to sit down, and He would ask me my story. He would take the time to listen to my ramblings or my anger until I could calm down, and then He would look me directly in the eye, and He would speak to me; He would tell me the truth, and I would sense in his voice and in the lines on His face that He liked me. He would rebuke me, too, and he would tell me that I have prejudices against very religious people and that I need to deal with that; He would tell me that there are poor people in the world and I need to feed them and that somehow this will make me more happy. I think He would tell me what my gifts are and why I have them, and He would give me ideas on how to use them. I think He would explain to me why my father left, and He would point out very clearly all the ways God has taken care of me through the years, all the stuff God protected me from
I think it's a very beautiful picture that Donald Miller painted, and somehow it reminds me of the scene where Jesus prepared breakfast for his disciples after the resurrection. while I do not agree with the part about something within us that caused Him to love us(i don't just not believe it, i BELIEVE that we were unworthy of His love), this story managed to make me slow down. i wasn't walking anywhere, rather i was already sitting down, but what i meant was the pace of thoughts in my mind. it started to give me that strange feeling again, where i would be lost for words, while at the same time a vast pool of random words were swirling around in my head. and this time i tried not to arrange the words. instead i tried to embrace the fleeting moment. some part of me either believed this story, or wanted to believe this story.
and another part of me was ashamed at the difference between the love that God gave, and still gives me, contrasted to the love that i offered pathetically. But i guess that's why He died for us.
i know that this post is posted at the risk of turning this blog into my own blog. but to be honest, not only did i not have any pointers for this week's prayer chain, i also felt that this excerpt would benefit us.
so there are not really any prayer pointers for prayer chain this week. but if God puts a prayer pointer in your heart then please share it with your prayer chain group(what else would you do!?).
I really hope this excerpt has blessed each of you.
Chao Yuan
>>and i live just for you my lord.
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